(Self) Date Night

You've heard the saying, "treat yo self". I have my own rendition of that, "date yo self". It's so easy to overlook, ignore or lose track of not just who we are, but what makes us...us. We can focus so much on what needs to get done or the outside relationships in our lives, that we forget about the most important relationship we have, the one with ourselves. I know for me, with EVERYTHING I have going on in life, I can easily forget to make myself a priority in even the smallest way. But this isn't about self care, this is about dating. If we're in a relationship with a person, whether it be pursuing, dating or marriage, we do our best to make sure that person feels loved. We tend to do that through the obvious form of dates. We schedule time, plan an event, moment, memory or adventure and keep that time as sacred and special. So why don't we do that for ourselves.

It took me many many years to get to the place where I not only started to love who I am, but also to want to spend quality time with myself and my thoughts. That can at time feel a little dangerous (getting in your own head is a real thing....yikes). Yet when I started doing it, taking a few hours to do something I love, or just hang out in my car at the park by myself with some Starbucks (yes, that's my personal date spot), I started feeling more centered and at peace. Going on little trips by myself or using a work trip to spend a little extra time to make it about me. All those intentional dates helped me to "fall in love" with myself again and again.

I know what you're thinking, "falling in love with yourself?! That sounds either weird or super conceited". But that's where you're wrong. We've all heard the concept, "we show people how to love us by how we love ourselves"....and if you haven't heard that, here you go. But it's so true. If we can't love ourselves, how can someone else (that's a lot of pressure to give that person)? If we can't date ourselves, how can we properly date someone else? The difference I have for "self care" and "self dating" is that self care is a little thing I try to do for myself every day or a few times a week. It's taking time alone to catch up on a TV show or have a five plus step night time skin care routine (some of you get it and have it). But dating myself....that's going to see a movie alone, spending hours in a museum by myself, or just doing a spontaneous park date when the weather is nice. It can be anything. It's usually planned, but it's always just for me.

So for this Valentine’s Day or Galentine's Day, while you're finding time to have something special for your someone special (or group of special gals or guys), plan something special for yourself. Take yourself on a "night on the town". Grab a drink....or two. See that movie you've been dying to see. Take that morning hike you've been dreaming of. Take that road trip. Whatever it might be....give yourself that date your soul has been needing. It makes all the difference, not just in how you see the world, but how you see yourself.